


Egostuck

by elysianBlessing



Category: Homestuck, jacksepticeye, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: AU, Crossover, Homestuck AU, Jacksepticeye AU, Markiplier AU, Other tags to be added, cursing, egostuck au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-13 20:28:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18038447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elysianBlessing/pseuds/elysianBlessing
Summary: (A Markiplier and Jacksepticeye ego AU (it’s Homestuck!))“Bing” Steele gets wind of the beta of a new game debuting, and preorders it - and convinces his three friends to do the same!It doesn’t exactly turn out how they expected, though..





	1. Chapter 1 (Bing Steele)

Your name is Brad Steele. However, you prefer the nickname “Bing”.

So, for all intents and purposes, your name is _Bing_ Steele. Not Brad; that’s.. a stupid name. Who names their child that anymore?

Not many people, you would think. (Of course, there’s nothing really wrong with it, it’s just not for you.)

But, names aside; you are thirteen years old.

Among the things you like, you are into music that would best be described as “delinquent,” video games, and sports. Specifically, skateboarding.

Does that count as a sport? You’re pretty sure it does. But nonetheless, you enjoy it! You enjoy trying to do tricks.

Even if you aren’t good at it. But you entirely are, and anyone who says otherwise is just lying.

Especially your friend, Dark.

But your main focus today isn’t your sickass skateboarding tricks.

Today is the day your preorder of the beta of a new video game is supposed to come in the mail, and you’re just waiting for your Uncle to get home so you can go check your mailbox.

He doesn’t like you leaving the apartment without telling him, or unless he’s home, which you guess really isn’t that outrageous. God knows who’s running around the complex right now, and the mailboxes are at least eight minutes away. So, either your Uncle will check the mail on his way home, or you can walk and do it when he gets back.

Until then, you figure you can just hang out in your room for a while. That’s what you usually do, anyways.

It’s not like it’s a bad thing; your room’s pretty nice, you’d like to think! At least you’ve got stuff to do.

Liiike.. your laptop! Which mostly has a bunch of video games on it. And your Pesterchum, which you haven’t really used much today.

Maybe you can just talk to one of your friends until your Uncle is home!

Yeah, you figure that’s what you’ll do.

So you grab the laptop off your desk, instead going over to your bed and sitting down, opening it and opening the chat client with a smile.

Now, who was online..?

..Ah!

—— defectivePerfection [DP] began pestering fracturedSpirals [FS] at 11:25! ——

DP: hey  
DP: heeey  
DP: daaaaaark  
DP: bro r u on  
DP: DAAARK  
FS: For Christ’s sakes.  
FS: What. Do you want?  
DP: wht r u doin dudeee  
FS: I was reading.  
FS: Keyword: “WAS”.  
DP: oh whtevr lighten up  
DP: yo u signed up for the sburb beta preorder rite  
FS: That thing you keep incessantly pestering me over?  
FS: Yes.  
FS: I don’t know why I agreed though, considering I don’t play video games.  
DP: well ur gonna this time bro  
DP: so get used to it!!!  
DP: hey have u tlked to SI n GS yet today  
FS: No, no, I haven’t.  
FS: As I said, I was reading.  
FS: And I would quite like to get back to it.  
FS: Therefore, I will ask you to bother them yourself if you’d like to speak to them.  
DP: UUUUUGH  
DP: ur no fun bro!!  
DP: but FINE  
DP: whtevr  
DP: bye bitch  
FS: ...Goodbye?  
FS: Was that meant to be an insult?

—— defectivePerfection [DP] ceased pestering fracturedSpirals [FS] at 11:46! ——

You roll your eyes, throwing the laptop onto your bed and pushing yourself to stand, letting out a huff as you go over to your window to look out, trying to see if you could see your Uncle’s car.

Sure enough, there it was, sitting in the parking spot as he got out, holding several bits of mail in his hand.

Your mood brightened at that, moving your hair behind your ears as you watch him close the car door, grabbing his keys from his pocket as he headed towards your breezeway.

You let out a small laugh as you move away from the window, grabbing your laptop from the bed and moving over to your desk, sitting down in the chair and all but throwing the electronic onto the desk itself. You consider pestering one of your other friends, but decide against it after a few moments; you can do that _after_ you see if the beta came in, after all..


	2. Chapter 2 (Dark Holden)

Your name is Dani Holden. But you mostly go by Dark on anything that would require an alias, hence why Bing just called you such a few moments ago.

You are thirteen and a half years old, and among your several interests are Gothic novels, ghosts, and otherwise occult things.

You were reading one such novel when one of your friends messaged you; Bing.

God, you’d almost gone half a day without him pestering you.. it isn’t at all that you don’t like him, it’s just that..

His.. demeanor.. is a bit tiring, to say the absolute _least._

Still, you set the book down on your lap, marking the page before you take your phone off your nightstand to open the messages.

—— defectivePerfection [DP] began pestering fracturedSpirals [FS] at 11:25! ——

DP: hey  
DP: heeey  
DP: daaaaaark  
DP: bro r u on  
DP: DAAARK  
FS: For Christ’s sakes.  
FS: What. Do you want?  
DP: wht r u doin dudeee  
FS: I was reading.  
FS: Keyword: “WAS”.  
DP: oh whtevr lighten up  
DP: yo u signed up for the sburb beta preorder rite  
FS: That thing you keep incessantly pestering me over?  
FS: Yes.  
FS: I don’t know why I agreed though, considering I don’t play video games.  
DP: well ur gonna this time bro  
DP: so get used to it!!!  
DP: hey have u tlked to SI n GS yet today  
FS: No, no, I haven’t.  
FS: As I said, I was reading.  
FS: And I would quite like to get back to it.  
FS: Therefore, I will ask you to bother them yourself if you’d like to speak to them.  
DP: UUUUUGH  
DP: ur no fun bro!!  
DP: but FINE  
DP: whtevr  
DP: bye bitch  
FS: ...Goodbye?  
FS: Was that meant to be an insult?

—— defectivePerfection [DP] ceased pestering fracturedSpirals [FS] at 11:46! ——  
FS: Bing?  
FS: Oh, for God’s sakes..  
FS: I just want you to know, if it was meant to be an insult..  
FS: It didn’t hurt.

—— fracturedSpirals [FS] ceased pestering defectivePerfection[DP] at 11:49! ——

You heave a sigh, rolling your eyes to yourself as you set your phone back onto the nightstand, leaning your head back against the headboard of your bed with a frown. You aren’t too sure you _ever_ understand how he works..

After a moment, you sit up, swinging your legs over the side of your bed before you stand, brushing your hair from your eyes. You did, indeed, sign up for that strange old game.. you weren’t exactly sure when it was supposed to come in.

You think, for a moment, that it must be soon if Bing were asking you about it, but.. thinking about it more, you brush that thought away. Bing would forget his own _head_ if it weren’t on his shoulders, no doubt he just forgot.

You look around your room a little, rubbing the back of your neck as you grab your phone off the nightstand, putting it into your pocket as you move to leave your room, pulling the door open and going into the hallway as you look around.

The house — manor, really — was.. as bare as it ever was. It was furnished, yes, but it was so neat it almost always looked frozen in time.

You wouldn’t complain any. You preferred things to be orderly, and your Caretaker worked hard to make sure it looked nice, anyways. You could hardly fault her for that, no, sir!

A few small seconds went by before you regained your thoughts, shaking your head to get yourself out of memories as you head down the hallway, holding your hands behind your back as you look around you.

Your Caretaker was, as usual, nowhere to be found.

She had a lot to do, and was usually out running errands; it wasn’t uncommon for you to be home alone.

You’re almost fourteen, after all. Old enough to handle yourself for a while!

So you simply shrug it off, going into the parlor. You notice a small stack of mail on the table, hesitating a bit before you go over, picking up the mail to look through it.

Most of it was bills or junk mail, but you do take notice of a small, thin package with a green logo on it, simply reading “SBURB” in big red letters.

Hm. Maybe your original thought was correct; you wonder if Bing received his, and if that was the reason he asked about you signing up if so.

You take the packet, setting the rest of the mail down as you head towards the kitchen, only looking away when you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.

You stop, taking it from your pocket and letting out a soft sigh when you read the name. At least it was, arguably, the _least_ insufferable of the lot..

—— superhumanIntent [SI] began pestering fracturedSpirals [FS] at 12:13! ——

SI: HEY!!!!!  
SI: you there, bud??  
FS: Hello. How are you?  
SI: im doin’ great, man!  
SI: howsit goin’ for you??  
FS: It is.. going. I’m not quite positive how it is going, but it is going.  
SI: hey, dude, if it isnt goin’ bad, then thats better than nothin’!  
SI: oh shit, is it dude today  
FS: Yes, Jackie.. thank you for asking.  
SI: okay cool!  
SI: so!  
SI: has anythin’ fun happened today?  
FS: Not particularly, no. The most interesting thing so far is that my copy of that game Bing has been going on about came in.  
SI: YO!!  
SI: really?  
SI: thats so cool!  
SI: i wonder if mines gonna come in?  
SI: did bing tell ya if his came in?  
FS: No, he was just.. rambling like he normally does.  
FS: He asked if mine came in, but I hadn’t seen it in the mail when I answered.  
FS: I plan to inform him next time I speak with him.  
FS: However, currently my main plan is just to get something to eat.  
FS: I’ll get back to you afterwards.

—— fracturedSpirals [FS] ceased pestering superhumanIntent [SI] at 12:21! ——

And with that, you tuck your phone into your pocket, brushing your hair behind your ear as you enter the kitchen, perfectly content to just get a bit of food before you concerned yourself with that game..


End file.
